"I Found Bolder Options Again"

Marcus and Erik first met through the Bolder Options Mentoring Program in 1994. Recently, after more than 30 years, they reconnected. Marcus, Erik and Darrell Thompson went out to lunch together, and many of the memories from Marcus’s time in the program came rushing back. Shortly after their lunch, I spoke with Marcus to talk about what he remembered about Bolder Options, his relationship with Erik, his mentor, and how the program impacted his life.

“The program back then was nice. Erik was my mentor and we trained for 5Ks and 10Ks, running around the lake. At that time, when I met Erik, I was only going to school three times a week. He was a good mentor. We went deeper than just the running.”

“Erik was someone to talk to, besides my friends and my parents. It took a while to warm up to him but he became my buddy.”

Marcus remembers doing many different activities with Erik, even when he wanted to give up. At Vertical Endeavors, Marcus was scared to climb the wall, but Erik encouraged him to keep going. The same thing happened when they ran together. When Marcus got a side stitch or wanted to stop, Erik would jog alongside him and help him push through.

“He would never ask me to do something that he wouldn’t do.”

One of Marcus’s favorite memories was traveling to Boulder, Colorado. “It was awesome as a teenager to travel to a different state. We went to a skating rink and horseback riding. And I will never forget this pizza place in downtown Boulder. It was dark, with a low ceiling and great pizza.”

Marcus remembers being nervous, but he also knew he was with people he could trust. “I was happy to get away from my parents, and I was proud. Colorado was a long way away. When I went back to school I talked about how I got to go horseback riding, skating and running.”

A Positive Outlet

At first, Marcus wasn't sure about being in the program. “At first I was against the program and felt forced into it, but my mentor never gave up on me. He always pressed me and challenged me. He gave me space, but he still stayed there, even if it was just to sit quietly. He never left, he never changed and he stayed with me the whole way.”

“Bolder Options was there at a critical moment in my life. I was having trouble in school and getting in trouble for fighting. Bolder Options was my outlet. They were like my extended family.”

That persistence eventually helped Marcus open up. “He helped me open up to people, so I don't push good people away. I started talking to him, sharing things with him and doing things with him. He broke me down. He wore me down.” Marcus laughed.

Running gave Marcus a positive outlet at a time when he needed one. “I was always running, doing something positive. I was too tired to get in trouble. And I was proud, and other people were proud of me. They even did a news clip on us back in the day for running around the lake.” He remembers how much it meant to have people notice him for doing something positive.

“So many doors opened. It was just nice to have people talk and say good stuff about you. It really built my self-esteem up. I was meeting new people and I felt like I was part of something that was important to me. Bolder Options made my world bigger.”

As Marcus became more involved in the program, his interests and priorities began to change. “Certain things didn't excite me anymore, like getting in trouble or hanging with the wrong people. I didn't want to be around them. I wanted to do something else. I wanted to do something more positive.”

Finding Bolder Options Again

More than 30 years later, Marcus found himself looking for the organization that had been such an important part of his childhood. “I'd been looking for Bolder Options at the same location over there in South Minneapolis, but it was gone. I had been looking for it for a year. And then one day I was just walking and saw the Bolder Options sign.”

When he reconnected with Darrell, the years seemed to disappear.

“They called Darrell in and it was just so good to see him. He was like family. Like, man, I missed y'all. Y'all were a part of my childhood growing up.”

That feeling continued when Marcus, Erik and Darrell recently sat down for lunch.

“We sat at the table and it felt like old times. They still look the same. I'm the only one who got gray in my beard. It was like I never left, even though I hadn't talked to them in years. All the memories came back. It was nice. I am glad I finally found them.”

Coming Full Circle

Marcus was also welcomed back as part of the Bolder Options alumni community. Darrell gave Marcus a graduation plaque and a sweatshirt. They joked that young people in the program have it a little easier now. “Back in the day, you were running, that's all you got. You didn't get an option!” For Marcus, becoming an alum means he now has a chance to be part of the program in a different way. “He's like, ‘You're an alumni now.’ I'm like, ‘Yeah, alumni, like a big brother for the program.”

“Life wasn't perfect after that program. I had my ups and downs, but I remembered what Bolder Options instilled in me, and it kept me out of trouble.”

Today, Marcus sees Bolder Options as more than a mentoring program. “Big ups to Bolder Options. I recommend that for anybody. It's like a brotherhood. It's being part of something bigger. It was just positive. I was able to work out, stay healthy, make good choices and do something productive.”

And after more than 30 years, the impact is still there.

“It still impacts me today. I will never forget them.”